Whatever story you’re telling yourself about your level of confidence – I’m just a nervous person; I’ve just always been naturally shy; I talk too much when I’m nervous; I’m socially anxious; I always feel I have to make people laugh – whatever that story is, just put it to one side for now.
Side note: It is a story. It isn’t fact. Your story about your level of confidence and indeed who you are, is something that you have created. You might think that you’ve used experiences and feedback and memories to create this; but in fact, you’ve used your biased recollection and perspective of experiences and feedback and memories in order to decide who you are. Your story isn’t written in the third person from the viewpoint of an independent observer or narrator; it’s in the first person, from the viewpoint of the main character (you!)
In fact, the amount of confidence we believe we have isn’t important. It’s what we do with it that counts.
‘The Confidence Trick’ is the ability to change your state and become confident in moments where you’re not; to be able to create the feelings of confidence at any given moment.
Tony Robbins recommends the following steps for instant confidence:
- Physiology: Imagine how you would walk, move, stand and breathe if you were incredibly confident. Then do it!
- Language: Imagine the way that you would speak to both others and yourself if you had unstoppable confidence. Then do it!
- Focus/Belief: Imagine what you would believe and focus on if you were supremely confident and hell bent on success. Then do it!
It’s that simple folks.
Body language – words – beliefs – focus.
And the more that you practise calling upon this confidence, the more of it you’ll grow.