Recently, I finished Amy Cuddy’s incredible book, ‘Presence: Bringing Your Boldest Self to Your Biggest Challenges.’
Honestly, I can’t recommend it enough. The researching findings into body language are just fascinating and I’m now even more convinced that as well as changing our thoughts and beliefs to create emotions in the body, we can create emotions in the body that feed into our thoughts and beliefs.
Essentially, I’m talking about creating confidence in the body, to as Amy says, ‘fake it until you become it.’
So – like the #powernerd that I am, I’ve been power-posing every day.
Yes, it’s true. I, a professional woman of 35 years, stands for minutes each day, looking at my invisible cape behind me, or performing the Wonder Woman in front of the mirror. “I too am I neat guy….”
But guess what… it’s working! I’m increasingly conscious of my body language throughout the day. I’m striving to walk taller, with shoulders back, to avoid looking down, to make eye contact.
Simply put, and on Amy’s advice, I’m trying to make myself bigger.
I see now that years of social anxiety has made me shrink – literally. When I’m even slightly uncomfortable, I retreat into myself. I hide. I make myself smaller. I become the scared kid, looking down at their shoelaces, desperately praying not to be picked to answer a question. I always believed that this body language was a result of how I was feeling/thinking. I never once considered that by allowing my body to shrink in this way, I was reinforcing and even creating feelings of unworthiness.
Now that I’m striving to make myself bigger, I’ve found that not only am I feeling less anxious and more capable… other people around me are responding to me as if I’m more capable too. I’m increasingly shocked by the results.
And you will be too. Just try it!
You don’t have to believe in yourself, you just have to move like you do.